Ask Yourself This Simple Question. What Defines You?

Most people allow themselves to be defined by things other than who they are. They allow themselves to be defined by what other people think, by circumstances, by many things beyond their control. Or they allow themselves to be defined by their achievements, how much money they make or how successful they are. Perhaps they define themselves by how much education they have or how much power and influence they have. This one is especially prevalent in political circles. Some define themselves or are defined by others according to their station in life. Do they work for that big law firm or major corporation and live in a six thousand square foot home on the lake or the golf course, or do they work at Walmart and live in a trailer park?

None of these things, in truth, define us. In fact, not only do they not make us who we are, most of them are the result of who we are. No, we cannot control what people think. Nor can we always control outside circumstances that are forced upon us. But, we can control how we respond to those things. At this point I would like to stop and ask a simple question. I suggest you reflect upon this question. Don't just dismiss the idea and don't answer immediately, off the cuff, either. Take some time. Reflect upon it. Get alone in a quiet place, away from the hustle and bustle of life and ask yourself this question. What defines you? Or, in the words of a philosophy professor I had back in my college days and we won't go into how long ago that was either, can you tell me who you are without telling me what you are?

I warn you, this is no easy task and it will mess with your head a little. However, I believe the exercise to be of tremendous value. Everything in our lives from business to relationships to our faith and most certainly our sense of self worth, depends upon how we feel about who we believe we truly are. In fact, feelings will probably come closer to the truth than a more pragmatic analytical approach. Most of us have difficulty being honest with ourselves. Perhaps we are afraid of what we will discover if we probe too deeply. We don't always like getting in touch with our feelings. Do it anyway, it's important. How can we be comfortable in the many different relationships we have in life, personal and business, if we are not comfortable with and have not accepted who we are? So do yourself a favor and ask yourself. What defines you?